Baptism and the Diploma – a clown skit for 2 talking clowns, typically a white face and an auguste, although any 2 clowns would do, dealing with baptism
(A 2-clown skit for introducing the topic of baptism. The only prop required is a certificate – a piece of paper rolled up & tied with a ribbon is more than sufficient. Begins with Clown 1 already on stage, as Clown 2 enters, very excited)
Clown 1: Wow, what’s up?
Clown 2: I got it! I got it! I’m so excited!
Clown 1: (mildly puzzled) Got what?
Clown 2: (showing diploma to the audience) A diploma! This shows that I graduated from Seminary, and now I can be the pastor of the WHOLE church!
Clown 1: (extremely puzzled) Wait a minute — when did you go to seminary?
Clown 2: (looking slightly embarrassed) Well, technically I wasn’t the one to go — Pastor was. But since I’ve got the diploma, I know everything he learned! So, I can be the Pastor now!
Clown 1: (shaking his head) Umm, it doesn’t work like that. The diploma doesn’t have any knowledge at all — and holding it doesn’t make you smarter, or ready to be a pastor. It’s just a symbol, that someone else (withering glare at Clown 2) worked hard, studied, learned & prepared to be Pastor – just holding it doesn’t do anything. It’s sort of like baptism.
Clown 2: (extremely puzzled) Holding the diploma makes me wet?
Clown 1: (reacts toward the audience, ala Oliver Hardy) No. But what if you were baptized, and you didn’t really believe in Jesus – what would you be?
Clown 2: All wet!
Clown 1: (confidentially, to the audience) In more ways than one! (to Clown 2) Right! Just being baptized doesn’t make you a Christian, any more than just holding a diploma makes you a Pastor. They’re both outward signs for other people to see what’s already happened.
Clown 2: Ohh — (as the light slowly dawns) So I may as well put this back?
Clown 1: That’s the first good idea you’ve had this morning. (both clowns exit)