2 PARTIES & A PIG STY – a skit for 4 or more speaking clowns, with lots of audience participation – original skit by Larry & Grannie for use with their AWANAs group
Characters: Lorenzo (L), Grannie (G), Jake (J), Ariel (A), AWANAs (AW)
Props: raggedy coat & hat snare drum, Funny money toy musical instruments, Wizzer whistles, tamale husks, Pigs & Pigs & Pigs, toy musical instruments, 3 piñatas party “crackers”, candy camp table, Party crackers string, musical instruments
[Grannie enters and addresses the kids]
G: Hi kids. It’s me! Grannie! And this is Ariel! And this is Jake! And last, of course . . . Lorenzo(!)!
We’re back again to tell you another story from the Bible. We call our 2 Parties & a Pig Sty, but tonight, it’s going to be different. Tonight we need more actors. LOTS more actors. In fact we plan to put on a play just for your leaders, because we need the rest of you to be our actors.
Now. Do you all know how to count? You do? Good! How high can you count? Wow! That high! Good, because we only need you to count to three. Lorenzo still has trouble counting above two, but if all of you can count as high as you say, why we shouldn’t have any trouble at all.
So. Let’s all count off by 3s, starting with you (points to the first kid in the first row. Go! [G lets the kids count off by 3s. If a teacher says a number, she should interject, ‘No, no! You’re just the audience, remember? And should encourage the kids to get through the numbers. Otherwise she should just wait.]
OK, everybody got a number? Good!
As I said, we call this story 2 Parties & A Pig Sty. That means that we need two groups of partiers, and one group of oinkers. And no matter what part you have to play, its an important part, so just get involved. That’s one of the points of the story. Groups 1 & 3 are the partiers, and group 2 are the pigs.
And now here are Jake, Lorenzo and Ariel to tell you what each of you should do. Jake?
Jake: OK. For you guys who are at the first party, we have some of these [displays a cracker]. Here’s how you use it [demonstrates how].
When you hear Granny say “so the son went into a foreign county and spent his money just partying around”, you run up on stage and yell, “YaaaaaaYY!” & “Party on, Dude!”, & “Whoopieeee!” & anything else you can think of like that. And then shoot off your crackers. And run around & make plenty of noise.
And we want you to blow these [displays wizzer whistles]. Blow them a lot! And if anyone gives you this [displays funny money] take it. And if anyone asks you for some of it just refuse & get away.
Except at the end, when we’ll collect all the props (except the crackers) for the next time.
Got it? OK. Lorenzo?
Lorenzo: The next scene will be with the pigs. Now I want you to know that the pigs are very important. You’ve got to make the scene really work. We’ve brought a pig for each of you, but that isn’t the best part. What we want you to do is, when you here someone say, “Oh, sure I’ll help you”. You can work for me. Follow me”, is, run up on stage & run around and around whoever is on stage & grunt like this:
[Makes disgusting swine noises]. Now let’s here you.
What ? Is that the best you can do? Louder! Louder! Yes, that’s good.
And while you run around oinking, go up to whoever is on stage & bump into them. And put your head on their shoulder. And show them just how friendly you are.
Got it? OK. Ariel?
Ariel: OK, second partiers. When you hear someone say, “let’s have a party, because my son is back”, you run on stage & act like the first party group, & yell, and dance around. We’ve brought these musical instruments for you. Play them and shout Hallelujah!.
And we’ll have a surprise at the end.
Got it? Good. Grannie?
G: Places everyone.
[Jake, Lorenzo & Ariel take their respective groups to different corners of the sanctuary & tell them to wait until they hear their line. The 3 leads then return & stand on the stage.]
G: Once there was a man [Lorenzo points to himself & smiles] who had a daughter & a son. He loved them both very much & wanted them to be happy and good. He was very rich and he shared his wealth with his children & with all of the people who worked for him. All of them had fine clothes and they ate the best food possible.
And one day, when the father passed to a better world, everything he owned would go to his daughter & his son.
But his son became very restless. One day he came to his dad & said:
J [to L]: Pop, I’m bored. All we ever do around here is work and keep house. We never have any real fun! I’m looking for excitement!
Why don’t you just give me the money now that you would give me after you go to a better place? I think I can manage it at least as well as you can.
G: The father thought a while. [Lorenzo muses.] then he said:
L: Weeell, . . . OK. If that’s what you really want . . .
J: Yes, I do!
L: Well, OK. Here’s your share of my money. But I hope you’ll save a little, just in case you ever need to call home.
J: Oh, I will, Pop, I will.
[L turns sadly away & walks off the stage.]
J: Yippiee! I’m rich!
G: Then the son bought a plane ticket to a foreign country where they were famous for their parties. [J spreads his arms out like a jet plane & runs around the stage once, growling like a jet engine, then stops.]
J: O boy, O boy, O BOY! Here I am in a foreign country where they have great parties! Now I’m really gonna have a good time!
G: “So the son spent his money just partying around” [This is the signal for the 1st party kids run on stage and run around making noise.]
Partiers: “YaaaaaaYY! Party on, Dude!” Whoopieeee! PAR-tee! PAR-tee! PAR-tee! PAR-tee! [They shoot off their crackers, and blow their whistles & wave their arms & have a gay old time.]
J: Wow! Look at all my friends! They’re so great! Nothing like my fathers dumb old friends & employees back home. We just party & have a great time all the time!
[He walks among the partiers handing out money.]
J: Here. You’re one of my friends. Have some money.
You too. You can use some money can’t you?
And you. I especially like you. You can have twice as much!
And I like the way you blow your whistle!
And here’s some for you.
And you.
And you!
[When he has passed out all of the money Grannie speaks]
G: But one day something awful happened. [Ariel beats the drum several times]
There was a terrible disaster! [drum]
The son lost all of his money! [drum]
J: Oh, my friends. You’ll help me, won’t you? Please? Don’t you remember when I gave you all that money? Pleeeeaaassseeeee! Just a little! [J goes from person to person holding out his hand & asking for money, but they all scoot away & refuse to give him any.]
G: Before long he lost everything [drum] He lost his home [J steps off the stage.] And he soon lost all of his fine clothing & had to wear an old raggedy hat & coat [J puts them on] And he couldn’t find a job. So he wandered around for some time [J gets back on the stage & wanders aimlessly] Until he met a man [L steps on stage with the tamale husks] who said:
L: “Oh, sure I’ll help you” You can work for me. Follow me. [Turns toward the audience] [At this point the pigs charge onto the stage, running around & around & grunting loudly.]
L: Here. Feed my pigs these husks. {L walks off the stage while the pigs run around J oinking & annoying him.]
G: The poor son was very unhappy. He didn’t like pigs at all! [J makes a face.] And besides he was still hungry. [J makes another face & rubs his stomach.] He even tried to eat some of the pigs’ food [J attempts to chew a husk & makes the worst face he can.] Finally the pigs ran away [oinkers leave the stage] & the son had time to think. He thought:
J: You know, even my Dad’s employees eat better than this! And they wear better clothes! You know I think I’m just gonna go home & apologize to my Dad. I’ll say, “Dad I really messed up & I don’t expect you to take me back as a son. But could you at least give me a job?”
G: So the son started off for home [J walks down the left aisle to the back, turns & walks up the right aisle. Meanwhile Lorenzo walks to the middle of the stage.] But as the son came down the road toward home his Dad saw him way up the road, while he was still just a speck. [Lorenzo scans the horizon.]
But he recognized his son! [Lorenzo shows signs of recognition, jumps off the ground & snaps his fingers.] The father ran down the road to meet his son.
L: [L runs up & throws his arms around J.] Oh, joy! Oh, boy! Boy, O boy, O boy, O boy! Wheee-eee, hee, hee, hee hee, hee, hee hee, hee, hee! My son, my son, my son, my son!
J: “Dad I really messed up & I don’t expect you to take me back as a son. But . . .
L: [making a sweeping, ‘never mind’ gesture] O, never mind all that. Here! Take off those dirty, smelly clothes! [pulls of J’s hat & coat] We’ve got some really good clothes you can wear! [J & L walk arm-in-arm up to the stage, when they get there, L says:]
L: Hey everybody! Let’s kill the fatted calf – well actually what we have looks like a bull, because we’re clowns. Anyway we’ll take turns hitting it with this stick until someone breaks it. When that happens, grab candy & pass it out to everyone. And let’s have a party, because my son is back I was afraid he was dead, because boy he sure was lost”.
[At this point the 2nd party group rushes on stage & begins to shout & sing & run around like the first group. L takes the piñata & places it in the middle of the group & gives a partier a stick. The partier takes a swipe at the piñata. If he/she fails, others try, until the piñata breaks. Then the kids grab & pass out the candy.]
G: Unfortunately the daughter was at work when the party started. [A walks across the front to where G is standing] When she came home she could hear it going on. She asked someone:
A: [to G] What’s all this?
G: Your brother showed up again & your Dad has killed the fatted calf & they’re having a party.
A: Maaann! That’s really lame. I’ve been working hard all these years for Dad & when my worthless brother shows up Dad throws a part for him! That just makes me mad. REAL mad! [She sits down on the floor & sulks.]
G: Her father came out to talk to her.
L: [stepping off stage] Why Ariel, what’s wrong?
A: I’ve been working hard all these years for you & you never even had a birthday party for me. But when my worthless brother shows up, who just partied & partied till all of your money was gone, you throw a BIG party for him! Don’t I have a right to be mad? REAL mad?
G: But the father patted her gently on the back & said:
L: Daughter, everything I own is yours, and we love each other & don’t have to prove it. But just think: my son – and your brother -is back! We were afraid he was dead, because boy he sure was lost. Doesn’t that rate a party? Come on, now! Let’s go in & celebrate!
[L & A lock arms & return to the stage together.]