Clown Auditions

Clown Auditions




Application-  Jesus is the only one who can give you comfort when you’re alone.

Scripture- 2nd Corinthians

Props

Juggling Props

Clowns

Doc the Rube, JJ, Sparky, Steve Bailey, Minnie, Skippy the Wonderdog

Audiovisual

Music- Circus Music

Microphones

Notes

  • Steve Bailey, if on stage, dresses us as a Ringmaster.
  • Feel free to substitute.  For example, if you don’t have a Wonderdog (and how many of us do), feel free to have multiple cute, adorable children (or whatever else) instead
  • Feel free to add more clowning.  For example, when I did this (substituting for Sparky), I had the idea of having a damp sponge hidden inside a handkerchief, so I could “wring out my tears”.  If performing this inside, be sure to get permission first!  In the same way, feel free to add other bits of clown business – just don’t stretch it out so long that the point is missed

Skit

Steve Bailey: [Steve announces from the audiovisual booth.] “Attention, please.  Next up for the clown auditions. Doc and JJ.”

[Doc and JJ enter and begin a fancy juggling routine.]

Steve Bailey:  [after only a few seconds“Next.”  

[Doc and JJ are exasperated but move to the side of the stage.  Sparky enters tentatively and approaches the stage microphone.]

Sparky: “Have you heard the one about…”

Steve Bailey: “Next.”  

[Doc and JJ laugh at Sparky and then pull him to the side of the stage.  Minnie enters with Skippy the Wonder Dog and curtsies while smiling.]

Steve Bailey: “Oh, yes, very nice.  I think we found our act.  Thanks to all you other clowns for coming today.  Goodbye.”  

[Minnie and Skippy exit.  Doc and JJ walk to center stage.]

Doc: “Well, I guess that we didn’t get the job.  O well. Better luck next time. Kids and animals always get chosen..”

JJ: “Well, I think that Cirque de Soleil will be calling us soon anyway.”  

[Doc and Jj see Sparky looking sad and dejected.  They go to him.]

Doc: “Hey what’s wrong with you?”

JJ: “Sparky, are you ok?”

Sparky: “Yeah, sure I’m ok.”  [He sniffles his nose and looks dejected.]

JJ: “Why are you crying like that?’”

Sparky: “How am I supposed to cry?”

JJ: “You’re not sad because of the auditions are you?”

Sparky: “I’ve never felt so sad and alone.”

Doc: “Alone, How can you feel alone in a room full and people and us?”

JJ: “Besides, even without all of these people, you’re never alone.”

Sparky: “What do you mean?  If I’m alone, how can I not be alone?

Doc: “Jesus is the answer.  He is always with you.”

Sparky: “Always?”

JJ: “Sparky, Jesus is the only one who can give you comfort when you’re sad and alone, and he always understands.”

Sparky: “How do you know all this?”

Doc: “The Bible says in 2nd Corinthians, when we receive comfort from God and Jesus we can comfort others.  Sparky how would you like to join our act? Say what was that joke again?”

[They walk off-stage]

Bring your pet to show and tell

Bring your pet to show and tell – a skit for a speaking clown troupe

[Editor’s note: my clown friend, Doc the Rube, told me that his daughter had an inflatable dinosaur costume – and did I have a skit?  Well, now I do!]

Props: dog puppet (or balloon twisted dog, or even a real dog), an empty page (for the flea circus), and the inflatable dinosaur costume.

[The skit begins with 1 clown as the teacher and three more as the “students”]

Mrs. Simon (teacher): All right, children, did you all bring your pets to Show and Tell today?

First child: Mrs. Simon, can I go first?

Mrs. Simon: Yes, you may.

[Child goes to the wing, comes back with a dog puppet, addresses the ‘class’ — the audience]

First Child: This is my new puppy, Puddles.  Say hi to the kids, Puddles! [puppet waves]  He’s a brand-new puppy at our house.  My dad named him “Puddles” because … [looks down at her arm] … Oh, Puddles! How could you! [dashes off-stage]

Second child: My turn! [goes off-stage, brings back an empty cage] This is my trained flea, Fernando! [opens the door of the cage] Here Ferdinand! [pantomimes the flea jumping over his arms, tummy, etc.] Stop that! You’re tickling me! I’m warning you! Stop it! [swats the “flea”] Oh, no! Ferdinand! [runs off stage, weeping]

Third child: My turn! May I bring my lizard in?

Mrs. Simon: A lizard?  Well, I suppose so …

Third child: Great! [goes to the wing, brings out the person in the T-Rex costume, if possible on a leash]  This is my pet, Rex.

Rex: [looks at the crowd, pantomimes being hungry, licks lips, rubs tummy, speaks in a deep voice] When do we eat?  [pause] And who? [skit ends with Rex chasing the teacher off stage, yelling “Snack time!”]

[Editor’s note: for an example of the ‘flea’ routine, you can see Charlie Chaplin‘s version in Limelight]

Pretty Good Guy

Pretty Good Guy – a clown ministry skit for 2 speaking clowns – courtesy of the Asbury clown troupe

props required: tie, walker, long list of sins (likely 8.5″ x 11″ paper taped at the ends), tie, chalk slate

(both enter together) (background music)  Continue reading

Holy Ghost

Holy Ghost – a clown ministry skit for a troupe of speaking clowns, talking about the Holy Ghost, and how Christians should see him in action

Application: You can see Jesus in the action of those who love him.

Scripture: John 14:21: They who have my commandments and keep them are those who love me, and those who love me will be loved by my Father, and I will love them and reveal myself to them.

Doc enters, sits down, pulls out his lunch of a fish skeleton. Continue reading