Sailor Beware (1952) starring Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis
The description from Amazon.com reads:
“Chasing pretty girls, blowing up a liferaft inside a submarine, virtually every sailor gag ever thought of, and a bunch of songs fill out this Martin and Lewis outing as a pair of sailors.”
That pretty much summarizes it pretty well. Effectively, Sailor Beware is a series of skits or sketches around the theme of being in the Navy. Giving ample room for slapstick for Jerry Lewis, singing for Dean Martin, and comedic interaction between the two of them.
Sailor Beware is available as part of the Martin and Lewis Collection, Volume 1
Editorial Review of Sailor Beware starring Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis
Because of a misunderstanding Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis) is inducted into the Navy despite numerous allergies. When appearing on a TV show sponsored by a lipstick manufacturer, fluke circumstances cause him to be perceived as an irresistibly great kisser, and he is undeservedly hyped in the media as ‘Mr. Temptation.’ His shipmates bet their pay that he can get Corinne Calvet, a sexy French chanteuse, to kiss him. Despite his allergy toward kissing girls, he tries not to let them down even though it threatens his relationship with girlfriend Hilda. …Sailor Beware
Songs
- Sailor’s’ Polka, Lyrics by Mack David, Music by Jerry Livingston.
- Never Before, Lyrics by Mack David, Music by Jerry Livingston.
- Merci Beaucoup, Lyrics by Mack David, Music by Jerry Livingston.
- The Old Calliope, Lyrics by Mack David, Music by Jerry Livingston.
- Today, Tomorrow, Forever, Lyrics by Mack David, Music by Jerry Livingston.
- Blue Hawaii, Music by Ralph Rainger, Lyrics by Leo Robin.
- Jingle, Jangle, Jingle, Music by Joseph J. Lilley, Lyrics by Frank Loesser.
- Say Si Si, Music by Ernesto Lecuona, English Lyrics by Al Stillman.
Funny quotes
In the Navy
[trying to fall asleep aboard ship]
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): Al, I’m thirsty.
Al Crowthers (Dean Martin): Drill a hole in the side of the ship!
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): I’ve never been kissed! Even my own mother didn’t have the nerve.
Al Crowthers (Dean Martin): That figures.
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): Excuse me, handsome.
CPO Lardoski: Where do you get that handsome stuff?
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): Didn’t I hear that man call you a pretty officer?
CPO Lardoski: [Growling] He said, “Petty officer.”
[Melvin sticks his tongue out at him behind his back]
Recruiting center
Sailor at recruiting center: Here are some papers that we have to have filled out; we hope it’s not too much trouble. And after that, would you mind going over to the corner and disrobing?
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): [shocked] I don’t even know you!
Naval Doctor: [Unable to find a heartbeat] Be a good boy now and tell the doctor where your heart is.
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): You’ll find out. I’m no stool pigeon.
Al Crowthers (Dean Martin): They can’t do this to me!
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): Why don’t you write your congressman?
Al Crowthers (Dean Martin): What good will that do?
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): Nothing, but you’ll have a pen pal.
Hilda Jones (Marion Marshall): Everybody should donate to the blood bank. What type are you?
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): Oh, the quiet type. I go to bed at nine o’clock, see a movie now and then, read some books, play checkers…
Hilda Jones (Marion Marshall): No! I mean what kind of blood have you?
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): Red.
[Jerry has blood drawn, but it looks like water]
Al Crowthers (Dean Martin): What have you been doing?
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): I donated at the blood bank.
Al Crowthers (Dean Martin): It looks like your account’s overdrawn.
Boxing
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): Why, I was fighting Gene Tierney once, and…
Al Crowthers (Dean Martin): Wait a minute! Don’t you mean Gene Tunney?
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): [shouts] You fight who you want, I’ll fight who I want!
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): Why d’ya put the bandage on my hand before ya put the gloves on?
Al Crowthers (Dean Martin): So when you hit’m, you won’t break your knuckles.
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): Why don’t you put some on my shoes so I won’t wear them out from running away from him?
Al Crowthers (Dean Martin): How many fights have ya had all together?
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): [Talking loudly in a punchy boxer’s voice in order to frighten his opponent] Oh, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah…
[Al hits him]
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): When ya add ’em up together now, I had 101 fights.
Al Crowthers (Dean Martin): Yup!
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): Oh, 101! I win ’em all but 100!
Melvin Jones (Jerry Lewis): There’s no basis for metabolism, certain unaware of the fact that there are other men concerned here, and you still can’t feel that a physical being is abstract. You’ve got to base the full heart and soul on the ingredients that other people are aware of the fact that physical being is isn’t even evolved. Isn’t that right?
Trivia for Sailors Beware
- Corinne Calvet shows disdain for the advances of the sailors in the nightclub. The manager mentions that she was enamored with the club’s former crooner who sang “Moonlight Becomes You,. And suggests that Dean Martin‘s character’s singing style might be a successful substitute. “Moonlight Becomes You” was a Bing Crosby standard, and Dean Martin consciously tried to imitate Crosby early in his career.
- James Dean has an uncredited part as the boxing opponent’s second
- The boxing scene was “written” by Jerry Lewis, who demanded an extra $50,000 for it. Which he then donated to the Muscular Dystrophy Association
[Updated August 2, 2022]