Fun With The Phone – Ideas for your telephone answering machine.
Nearly everyone has a phone answering machine or a voicemail system of some kind. And most outgoing phone messages sound something like this: “Hi, we are away from the phone, but at the sound of the tone please leave your name and number and we will call you back as soon as we can.” Very functional. Very boring. Not funny. Here are some ideas for adding color to your outgoing message. (more…)
The Joke’s On You — who should be the butt of your jokes?
This article was prompted by something I heard about the performance of a magician at a child’s birthday party. Now, granted, this wasn’t done by a clown, but I’ve seen clowns doing similar things. As one of his tricks, he has a young girl holding two handkerchiefs knotted together. He pulls her hands apart, and instead of a third handkerchief appearing he has a pair of ladies’ panties appear. The magician received the reaction he wanted: the audience laughed loud and long at the discomfiture of the young girl. She was on the verge of tears, having been publicly humiliated. For having done nothing more than helping on stage when asked. (more…)
5 of the scariest clowns in video game history
[Editor’s note: like a lot of professional clowns, I dislike the ‘scary clown’ trope in our society — but that doesn’t make them go away. The following is a list of 5 of the scariest clowns in video games; we need to know what’s out there if we want to counter it with happy, joy-bringing clowns]
Clowns can be both good and evil. In most cases, clowns bring joy to parties and entertain your children. Sometimes, however, clowns terrorize people.
If you’ve been playing video games, chances are, you’ve encountered some of these clowns. With that in mind, here are 5 of the most bloodcurdling clowns in the history of video games.
Needless Kane (Twisted Metal)
Needless Kane is the driver of Twisted Metal’s most popular vehicle, Sweet Tooth. Needless Kane is a psychopathic clown who loves murdering others either by running them over with his truck or shooting them with his trusted gun. Needless Kane is a nightmare in his own right, and those who played the original Twisted Metal will know why. His head is permanently on fire, which makes gamers wonder if he’s actually human or a demon sent by the rulers of Hell. His hideous grin is enough to make even a grown man cry.
image credit: Wikia
Ronald McDonald (McDonalds Treasure Land adventure)
Ronald McDonald, that sweet clown that represents the most popular fast food chain in America, is the stuff of nightmares in McDonalds Treasure Land Adventure. The game isn’t about Ronald eating his customers; instead it’s a game about him and his friends in search of treasure. Despite McDonalds Treasure Land Adventure being a perfectly normal adventure game, the 16-bit graphics weren’t too kind to Ronald. If anything, he looks terrifying in his own game. McDonalds Treasure Land Adventure is a game that I would not recommend to kids.
image credit: superadventuresingaming
Unicycling Clown (Basement Crawl)
Unicycling Clown is one of Basement Crawl’s playable characters that is nothing short of ghastly. He’s a baby clown that looks really old. He rides a unicycle and likes blowing things up with his joystick. It’s the bizarre combination of things that make up his character that makes Unicycling Clown mysterious and extremely scary.
image credit IGN
Kefka (Final Fantasy VI)
Kefka is the short-tempered and maniacal antagonist from Final Fantasy VI who can control magic. Pair that with being a psychopath and he is quite possibly the most dangerous clown on this list. He treats others like animals, and finds amusement in the suffering of others. Kefka is the epitome of evil and his cold and calculating nature makes him a nemesis to be reckoned with.
image credit: Comicvine
Zombie Clown (Left 4 Dead 2)
What’s scarier than an angry clown? An angry zombie clown. That’s right. If you’ve ever played the popular FPS shooter Left 4 Dead 2, you’ll know that zombie clowns are difficult to take down due to their agility. They charge at players and attract other zombies because of the noise they make. Up close, they’ll kick and punch survivors until no one is left standing.
mage credit: Wikia
Clowns have always been used in games for as long as we can remember. Whether they’re for good or evil, they’ve always added a bit of spice to the gaming industry. Apart from Twisted Metal, Left 4 Dead, and the other aforementioned games, clowns are also being used as static designs for casual titles. The online game Circus Charlie for the original Nintendo NES features a clown protagonist in each stage of the game. Additionally, Slingo, which is a game that was originally introduced by AOL in 1996, features a clown character on its title Slingo Extreme. All of this proves that clowns are flexible, which is why they can easily fit in any game, but nothing quite gets the blood pumping than a terrifying axe-wielding clown.
Do you have a favorite video game character that’s a clown? Let your voice be heard in the comments section!
As a boy, Jesse was a chicken plucker. He stood on a line in a chicken factory and spent his days pulling the feathers off dead chickens so the rest of us wouldn’t have to. It wasn’t much of a job, but at the time, Jesse didn’t think he was much of a person. (more…)
Comedies Greatest Era, By James Agee
Comedies Greatest Era – the Great Stone Face
This is a direct transcript from a section devoted to Buster Keaton in a 1949 article in Life Magazine by James Agee. It was written while Keaton was still alive and before the rediscovery of the majority of his films.
Welcome to FamousClowns.org, a website dedicated to the history and performance of clowning. Famous Clowns is run by Tom Raymond, who performs as a professional clown as Raynbow the Clown in Madison, Wisconsin, U.S.A.
What can you do here? There’s a free tutorial on starting clowning, articles on topics such as the Clown Commandments, biographies of famous clowns(including Charlie Chaplin, Red Skelton, Bob Bell, WGN-TV’s Bozo the Clown, Stan Laurel, Oliver Hardy, Emmett Kelly,Bob Keeshan,The Marx Brothers, The Three Stooges, and many others), reviews of books and movies on clowning, and much more.