Pretty Good Guy – a clown ministry skit for 2 speaking clowns – courtesy of the Asbury clown troupe
props required: tie, walker, long list of sins (likely 8.5″ x 11″ paper taped at the ends), tie, chalk slate
(both enter together) (background music)
| Doc | Hi, I’m Doc. I’m a sinner |
| Leonardo | And, I’m….. a Pretty Good Guy. |
| Doc | Every day I try to do what God tells me to do, and I fail. |
| Leonardo | And every day, I’m…. a Pretty Good Guy. |
| Doc | For instance, on my way to Asbury, I went over the speed limit. |
| Leonardo | I have never gotten a speeding ticket. |
| Doc | Really? You’ve never broken the speed limit? |
| Leonardo | I have never gotten a speeding ticket. |
| Doc | Hmmmm (pause) Another example. Right now, I’m kind of coveting that tie Leonardo is wearing. That is one amazing tie! |
| Leonardo | Isn’t it though? Didn’t pay a penny for it. The sales clerk must have dropped it in my bag by mistake. See how God takes care of…. pretty good people? |
| Doc | Well…. anyway. If it depended on me, I would never get to heaven. |
| Leonardo | Hey. Good people go to heaven! And I’m not just a good guy, I’m a pretty good guy! |
| Doc | So you think you’re good enough for heaven? |
| Leonardo | You bet! |
| Doc | Ok. Let’s make a deal. We’ll each keep track of our sins for the next, oh say, 50 years. We’ll mark down every sin and when we meet again, we’ll see how good we really are. Deal? |
| Leonardo | Deal (shake & exit) |
| BRIDGE music continues /pause/ as Leonardo walks down aisle | |
| Leonardo | (enters stage as “gramps” walker, tie, dragging paper list of sins, mumbles) Stupid list. Stupid deal. Stupid sins! |
| Doc | (enters with cane, stands next to Leonardo) |
| Leonardo | Doc! |
| Doc | Leonardo! Good to see you! Still have great taste in ties, I see. (sees list) Whoa! Is that your sin list?!?! |
| Leonardo | What did you expect? That’s 50 years worth. Where is your list? |
| Doc | (brings slate from behind back) Actually, it’s right here. |
| Leonardo | That’s impossible! There’s nothing on it! |
| Doc | I know. Isn’t that great! |
| Leonardo | How did you do that? |
| Doc | Oh, it wasn’t me. Christ is the only one who can wipe my slate clean. Every day I try to obey God and every day I mess up. Every day I say “God, I blew it again. I can’t do it without you. Forgive me.” And, every day He says, “I already have” and he wipes the slate clean. And that is why I can go to heaven. |
| Leonardo | (faces audience, drops sin list) Hello, I’m Leonardo and I’m a sinner. |
| Doc | And we’re forgiven. (exit together) (exit music) |