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What do you have in the bag?

What do you have in the bag? a free clown skit for 2 speaking clowns – original by Raynbow the Clown

Props: Large bag – optionally, other “things” to go in the bag, i.e. rubber chicken, KFC bucket, etc.

Raynbow the Clown saw his friend Goofy Grape walking towards him, carrying a bag over her shoulder.

“Goofy, what do you have in that bag?”, he asked.

[This is where some prop comedy comes into play.   If all you have is the bag, milk it for all it’s worth-€open the bag, take a peek inside, show an exaggerated “surprise” look to the audience, possibly followed by a questioning look and a second peek in the bag.   Remember the Rule of Three, and don’t overdo it.   Additionally, if you actually have something in the bag, this is a good time to introduce it to the audience – a rubber chicken, a large plastic egg (“This one’s not quite done yet…”, a chicken puppet (I personally like to use a KFC bucket with a hole cut in the bottom, and a chicken puppet inside so you can use the chicken as a third performer, reacting to the conversation, etc. …]
Goofy said, “I’ve some chickens in this bag!”

Raynbow said, “Goofy, if I guess how many chickens you’ve got in that bag, can I have half of them?”

Goofy (looks into the bag, makes a big production out of silently trying to count them – giant calculator, abacus, counting on her fingers, etc.) says, “Raynbow, if you guess how many chickens I’ve got in this bag, you can have them both!”

Raynbow thinks for a minute (thinking doesn’t come easy to a clown, and he makes a big production out of it …. think of the Three Stooges routine ending with “I got it!” “What?” “A terrific headache.”) and says, “Seven!”

Performance notes

  • Bear in mind that clowning is a performance art-€the worst thing that you can do is simply go on stage and just tell this old joke.   It would probably get some laughs, but that’s not what clowning is about-€don’t tell the joke, be the joke! Exaggerate your movements, your facial expressions, when you carry the bag, pantomime that it’s an enormous weight, etc.
  • I originally thought of this as just a short, funny little sketch, but if you wanted to use it for ministry, it would be easy enough to have an authority figure (children’s minister, etc.) come on afterward (or even have the clowns “freeze” at the end when he comes on stage) and ask the audience if people know by the way you live that you’re a Christian … or do you hide it like chickens in a bag?
Based on the “How many chickens in the bag?” joke


Computer nerd by day, professional clown on evenings and weekends (Raynbow), who combines the two by maintaining a bunch of websites dedicated to the history and performances of clowning, such as Free Clown Skits, and comedy such as Best Clean Funny Jokes.

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