The Great Train Robbery – I Love Lucy season 5, originally aired October 31, 1955
In The Great Train Robbery, Ricky, Lucy, Fred, and Ethel are simply riding the train back to New York City. This gives room for the typical “cheap” jokes at Fred’s expense and the “food” jokes at Ethel’s. However, there’s supposed to be a jewel thief on board, and Lucy turns the pulling of the emergency brake into a running gag — each time she thinks that she sees the thief.
That poor conductor
This drives the suffering train conductor (Frank Nelson, who finally became a regular cast member once the Ricardos move to Connecticut) to distraction, as she keeps doing it, causing increasing levels of chaos each time.
The man that Lucy wrongly suspects is, in fact, a jewel dealer, traveling with some newly-purchased jewels. He is also traveling with a gun for self-defense, which is what causes Lucy to suspect him. Lucy is tricked by the actual jewel thief into helping him rob the man. However, Lucy is eventually justified by the end of the episode, and all ends well.
The Great Train Robbery is available as part of the I Love Lucy season 5 DVD collection.
Funny quotes from The Great Train Robbery – I Love Lucy season 5
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): [carrying luggage] Boy, these are heavy!
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Why didn’t you let the porter carry them?
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): I’ll give you three guesses!
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): I need the exercise. I’m building up my muscles.
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): You’d build up more muscles by prying open that wallet of yours!
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): I heard they have wonderful food on this train, and I want to get in there before it’s all gone.
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Don’t worry, there’ll be plenty. They heard you were coming.
Conductor (Frank Nelson): Did you stop this train?
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Me?
Conductor (Frank Nelson): You.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Uh …
Conductor (Frank Nelson): Ma’am, did you stop this train by pulling that handle?
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Well, I didn’t do it by dragging my foot.
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Why don’t you mind your own business?
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): I am minding my business as a citizen.
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): That’s terrible.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Gee, it sure is. I can’t hear a thing.
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): I have never been so embarrassed in my whole life. Everybody on the train is talking about the screwy redhead with the itchy trigger finger.
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Come on, Fred. Let’s get out of this food and into something more comfortable.
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Gee, they have all the luck. Their car is right next to the diner.
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Well maybe I can get you an upper right over the stove. Then you can just let down a basket for your food.
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Ricky told me not to tell you something.
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): You’re not going to let a little thing like that stop you, are you?