Lucy and John Wayne

Lucy and John WayneI Love Lucy season 5 – originally aired on October 10, 1955

In the previous episode, Lucy and Ethel stole John Wayne’s footprints in cement — but Ricky insisted that they return them before they get into serious legal trouble.  However, when they try to return the footprints, they broke. Ricky then enlists the help from John Wayne (playing himself) to make a new set.

Lucy meets John Wayne - while trying to borrow John Wayne's boots, Lucy has to give him a massage
Lucy meets John Wayne – while trying to borrow John Wayne’s boots, Lucy has to give him a massage

However, given Lucy’s penchant for accidents, more than one will be needed.  Especially after Fred tries to make a “forgery” of John Wayne’s footprints, and the girls wrongly assume that the authentic new print is one of Fred’s forgeries.

Lucy and John Wayne is available as part of the I Love Lucy season 5 DVD collection.

Funny quotes from Lucy and John Wayne – I Love Lucy season 5

Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): [on seeing a new set of footprints] Freddie the Forger strikes again.

Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): [Speaking about her hair appointment] If I have to go to jail, I do not want to be known as a frowsy redhead.

Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Oh forget it, Fred. It’s dishonest to forge someone else’s footprints.
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Yeah.
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Look who’s turning honest all of a sudden, Dishwater Mertz and Frowsy Ricardo.

Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): [about Fred’s forgery] Well, for one thing, the feet are way too big.
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Yeah, I guess I shouldn’t have used Ethel’s shoes.

Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): [on the phone] No sir, my wife is the frowsy redhead.

Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): [on the phone] This is Ricky Ricardo. Ricky Ricardo. Well, I just made a picture of MGM. I’m an actor and an orchestra leader€¦
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): And a stool pigeon.
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): [repeats] And a stool pigeon.

Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Have you seen the morning paper?
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Only as it flew by.

Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): I don’t know what happened to Ethel
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): Well let’s just hope for the best
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Don’t worry Fred she’ll show up
Fred Mertz (William Frawley): I said let’s hope for the best.

John Wayne: Is she here?
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): No
John Wayne: Oh that’s too bad, I heard a lot about her from Bill Holden

Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): Mr. and Mrs. Masset described the two women as a middle-aged ‘Dish Water’ Blond
Lucy Ricardo (Lucille Ball): Oh, Oh, Ha Ha Ha, hey I didn’t read that part
Ethel Mertz (Vivian Vance): Go on
Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz): and a wild-eyed frowsy redhead

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